What is the cost of marriage?

[KinkiDude]

Was thinking about this earlier. What's the difference in cost between marrying and staying single? Now there's one important thing here that should be mentioned, and that is whether or not the guy really wants kids or not. As for me, right now, I don't really long for kids. When I got married, it was more about being with her, and accepting that kids will come, rather than getting married 'for' kids. Obviously, if you really want kids and feel that marriage is still necessary for that, then the question is not really "cost of marriage" so much as it is "cost of having kids"...

So, this question comes from the point of view that I had. Getting married to be with the love of my life (hard not to laugh now, isn't it?) and includes the kids that I thought would result from the union. Also, considering we live in Japan, this assumes a high likelihood that she will be a housewife with no income shortly after marriage. Some women keep working till they have the kids, but after that, no way eh?

Wedding: 1,500,000 yen + (that would be on the cheaper side of things)
Honeymoon: 500,000 yen (again cheap)

Extra cost of providing for her in additional rent requirements, food, insurance, etc.: EASILY 100,000 month = 1,200,000/yr x 40 yrs = 48,000,000 yen
2 kids (if you didn't really want them): 30,000,000 (at least) to age 20 each = 60,000,000

Even with all these under-estimations and I'm sure a myriad costs not included, we've already reached around 110,000,000 yen ($1 million USD). And these estimates are more for the average working stiff. Surely the final figure would be closer to three or four times that for a guy that makes a 'good' living.

$1 mil / 40 years = is $25,000/yr. = $68/day

Isn't that an awful lot of money when you can reasonably expect a 50% chance of your marriage blowing up within 5 years? (And STILL having to pay for kids and possibly alimony too!)

And, even in 'normal' marriages that 'work', the couple are often sick of each other after 10 years, no sex, just roommates really, blah, blah, blah... They love each other, but I wonder if that's more of a dependency thing. I'll be in most cases they could just as easily love another hottie that came along. LOL

Anyway, at $68/day on the LOW end for... for what? What is the benefit that is worth so much? Geez, for that kind of money, if you wanted to spend it, you could surely keep yourself busy with PLENTY of younger, attractive women who like sex (I'm talking gf's, not whores - though you could easily do that too on this kind of money) and probably give you much less grief than a wife would.

Sure, not everything can be boiled down to finance, but looking at these numbers, I'm thinking...

[randomcow]

That's cheaper than hired help.

RC

[RR645]

With kids money just disappears. But, I see no reason why the wife isn't working as well. Especially after the kid is walking and talking. The child should be going to kindergarten and that gives the wife time to get her ass to work. There are really no excuses. This might be Japan, but I see no reason to work like you are Japanese. I am sure the grandparents would be around as well so time is money and she will no doubt have the time.

50/50 on the bills, that's how it goes. You get free time to live your life, she does as well, and she also gets a kid that is absolutely adorable, will hopefully be able to speak 2 languages and also develop a bit of a Western mindset. That is your responsibility and you need time to teach the child that. You can't do that if you are working 50 hours a week while she sits home and watches silly daytime dramas. The situation for international marriages different than for Japanese couples. The wife should understand that and give you the time and space you need to raise your child.

[Rza]

Sure, not everything can be boiled down to finance, but looking at these numbers, I'm thinking...

... I should have done this cost analysis before I took the plunge.


Just busting your balls, taking the piss, whatever you want to call it, man.

[KansaiVet]

My best friend married a Japanese woman. They were married for 17 years. He moved the family to Hawaii shortly after the marriage. Now in the process of a costly divorce for him. Two kids, one of them hers from a different guy prior to them getting married. He raised that boy like his own and paid for everything.

She on the other hand refused throughout the marraige to even get a part time job. She sat in the rented house (very nice house) that he slaved at work to pay for and chain smoked all day. I have been to their house. It was always a mess. She never did housework. Piss on the toilets, smelled awful. Shit everywhere. Lazy bitch.

Well he gets this great opportunity to buy a smoking cool house with swimming pool in a great neighborhood from a family friend. Price $260,000. In order to qualify for the home loan he needed her to get a job which would bring in $1,000 per month. That's it. She pissed, moaned and whined and refused to do it. All the while sitting on her increasingly fat ass chain smoking. The seller sold to someone else. That house today is worth over one million dollars. My friend wanted to kill her.

So finally they are getting a divorce, but the financial costs are still adding up. She keeps upping the amount she wants in the divorce settlement. All for a woman who would not blow him 1 1/2 months into the marraige and did not have sex with him even once the last 7 years of marraige. Yet for the sake of his kids (one not even biologically his ) he endured. He recently was layed off from his very lucrative job. He is unemployed and she still wants a divorce settlement as if he was still pulling in the same salary. Greedy bitch.


Marraige. I will pass.

[RR645]

She on the other had refused throughout the marraige to even get a part time job. She sat in the rented house (very nice house) that he slaved at work to pay for and chain smoked all day. I have been to their house. It was always a mess. She never did housework. Piss on the toilets, smelled awful. Shit everywhere. Lazy bitch.

There is no shortage of hot girls who can get their own stuff. I never saw any reason ever to buy something for someone who couldn't get it for themselves. A present for a girl..., sometimes. Supporting and buying girls things, no. If she can't get it for herself than she can find some sucker to buy it for her and then we can use it together.

50% of your money is for the bills, 50% is yours. Same goes for her. That is fair.

[KinkiDude]

That's cheaper than hired help.

RC

Hired help where? Manhattan? $68/day is over $500/wk, or nearly $2100 a month, every month, for the rest of your life. Surely you can find a Filipina to do your house once a week for less than $100. That still leaves you $400. And remember, this is on the LOW end.

In that, I haven't even included birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, Valentine's day (or White Day in Japan), plus all the other shit that she'll whine about to you to get her. If you buy gifts for these occasions, that's money it'll cost you, but there's also all the gifts that SHE 'buys' for you (from the money YOU made), which you'll have to throw out or forget about at the bottom of the closet. (I've rarely had a woman buy me what I WANT for my birthday. It's usually something that she likes and unless her tastes match yours, it's wasted money. Even if she does try to get you what you want, unless it's a very specific item, they usually get it wrong. That why I now state explicitly what I want for my birthday when asked.)

Again, this estimate is by far on the low end, IMO. I think double would be more realistic.

[KinkiDude]

I see no reason why the wife isn't working as well.

I agree with you 100%. There is no reason at all why the fuck she shouldn't work and pull some money in as well. Do her part to contribute to the household. Well, I can introduce you to at least one Japanese woman who didn't like this way of thinking at all.

To be fair though, I think this is fair BEFORE marriage. You live in small apartment and there's just nothing for her to do all day but go bang the tennis coach out of boredom. F that. It's selfish and parasitic and disgusts me. Back in the day when you'd get married and be pregnant a month later, fine. There's no point in getting a job. But these days plenty get married and don't have kids for three to five years and she doesn't want to work? Bullshit.

That all changes, however when she gives birth. Even after the kids are in school, there's still a lot of work for her to do around the house if she is being a 'good' housewife. If she's making three proper meals a day, keeping the place clean, getting YOUR dry cleaning done, doing the laundry and shopping, AND dealing with all that kid shit after they get home too, I don't see it as quite that big a deal for her not to have a pt job. That sounds like she's pulling her weight. (Reality may be different?) If the guy makes enough, then I don't see the absolute need for her to have a 'job' as well.

[RR645]

I see no reason why the wife isn't working as well.

I agree with you 100%. There is no reason at all why the fuck she shouldn't work and pull some money in as well. Do her part to contribute to the household. Well, I can introduce you to at least one Japanese woman who didn't like this way of thinking at all.

That all changes, however when she gives birth. Even after the kids are in school, there's still a lot of work for her to do around the house if she is being a 'good' housewife. If she's making three proper meals a day, keeping the place clean, getting YOUR dry cleaning done, doing the laundry and shopping, AND dealing with all that kid shit after they get home too,

Kinki, don't let her pull that shit. I'm serious. If you want respect you make her pull her own weight. People don't appreciate what they don't have to work for and they don't appreciate people who just give them things. There might be a lot of work to do around the house but it can easily be done by two or three people (when the kid gets older) at night after work. Three proper meals are not a difficult thing either. Breakfast, made a home, lunch, made at school, and dinner made at night. It doesn't take long to make dinner. Weekdays are a rush but any loose ends can be tied up on the weekend.

Kinki, the sooner you straighten this out the better. The longer she sits on her ass the harder it is going to be to pry her away from the TV. Housework can be done in less than two hours during the day. The rest of the free time she has she is going to use whining to her friends about you. Make her use that time to carry her weight. You teach housewives don't you? Do any one of them have any appreciation whatsoever for the work their husband does? None that I have ever met, even ones who get everything they want. The more time they have to think the more time they have to complain.

50/50. Put half your salary on the table every month and let her work with that. Don't bend on this man.

[randomcow]

She keeps upping the amount she wants in the divorce settlement. All for a woman who would not blow him 1 1/2 months into the marraige and did not have sex with him even once the last 7 years of marraige. Yet for the sake of his kids (one not even biologically his ) he endured. He recently was layed off from his very lucrative job. He is unemployed and she still wants a divorce settlement as if he was still pulling in the same salary. Greedy bitch.

I note your point about her unreasonable demands but still, it proves that after 18 years there was still money left over at the end. Kinkidude, Machiavelian but there is your answer.

That's cheaper than hired help.

RC

Hired help where? Manhattan? $68/day is over $500/wk, or nearly $2100 a month, every month, for the rest of your life. Surely you can find a Filipina to do your house once a week for less than $100. That still leaves you $400. And remember, this is on the LOW end.

The figure that was thrown around when I asked about hired help (in Tokyo) before was 8000 yen once a week. I can't remember how many hours that got you. I understand we are talking the difference between full-time and part-time help but I was using it to compare with your (conservative) $68/day figure.

But dude,

Even after the kids are in school, there's still a lot of work for her to do around the house if she is being a 'good' housewife. If she's making three proper meals a day, keeping the place clean, getting YOUR dry cleaning done, doing the laundry and shopping, AND dealing with all that kid shit after they get home too

There is something wrong if a) the balance even concerns you, and b) you need to break it down like this. I mean, there's a general feeling of "fairness" but I'd never think of taking it to extremes. Look,

She on the other had refused throughout the marraige to even get a part time job. She sat in the rented house (very nice house) that he slaved at work to pay for and chain smoked all day.

I can't speak for KV's buddy, but I would wager a bet to say that he wouldn't have traded places with her. Her life sounds boring as shit. She exists, that's it. Fuck, I love going to work. There are shit days, and there are hard days, but overall I really enjoy working. Let the wives of the world sit at home and have coffee with their friends. It's no skin off my back - I'm at work, surrounded by colleagues, having a great time while feeling productive.

RC

[Bairen]

That all changes, however when she gives birth. Even after the kids are in school, there's still a lot of work for her to do around the house if she is being a 'good' housewife. If she's making three proper meals a day, keeping the place clean, getting YOUR dry cleaning done, doing the laundry and shopping, AND dealing with all that kid shit after they get home too, I don't see it as quite that big a deal for her not to have a pt job. That sounds like she's pulling her weight. (Reality may be different?) If the guy makes enough, then I don't see the absolute need for her to have a 'job' as well.

I'd agree with that fully. My wife is great about keeping our house clean and taking care of her kid, and she is busy from morning until night. She gets up before me in the morning and starts cooking my breakfast and making my lunch. All day while I'm at work she is busy feeding the kid, keeping him entertained (kids need lots of attention), doing laundry, and shopping for groceries etc. She makes two meals for dinner (one for us and one for him) and then cleans up everything. She usually doesn't go to bed until about 1am, and doesn't get a lot of free time to herself.

[KinkiDude]

She keeps upping the amount she wants in the divorce settlement. All for a woman who would not blow him 1 1/2 months into the marraige and did not have sex with him even once the last 7 years of marraige. Yet for the sake of his kids (one not even biologically his ) he endured. He recently was layed off from his very lucrative job. He is unemployed and she still wants a divorce settlement as if he was still pulling in the same salary. Greedy bitch.

I note your point about her unreasonable demands but still, it proves that after 18 years there was still money left over at the end. Kinkidude, Machiavelian but there is your answer.

My answer to what? I don't understand what you mean.

That's cheaper than hired help.

RC

Hired help where? Manhattan? $68/day is over $500/wk, or nearly $2100 a month, every month, for the rest of your life. Surely you can find a Filipina to do your house once a week for less than $100. That still leaves you $400. And remember, this is on the LOW end.

The figure that was thrown around when I asked about hired help (in Tokyo) before was 8000 yen once a week. I can't remember how many hours that got you. I understand we are talking the difference between full-time and part-time help but I was using it to compare with your (conservative) $68/day figure.

Oh, I see. You were comparing $68 with 8000 yen for one day of cleaning. Yeah, I thought you were comparing the overall cost.

Even after the kids are in school, there's still a lot of work for her to do around the house if she is being a 'good' housewife. If she's making three proper meals a day, keeping the place clean, getting YOUR dry cleaning done, doing the laundry and shopping, AND dealing with all that kid shit after they get home too

There is something wrong if a) the balance even concerns you, and b) you need to break it down like this. I mean, there's a general feeling of "fairness" but I'd never think of taking it to extremes. Look,

What are you talking about? I'm not splitting hairs or breaking anything down. I'm in fact supporting the work-at-home-mother in this and listing all of the things that she needs to do that keeps her plenty busy so I don't think she should necessarily be looking for a job if you make enough to have her stay home. There's nothing extreme in this example whatsoever.

And yes, there IS something wrong if you have to think about the balance! That's my point. One person shouldn't be contributing so little as to make the other think about the score in the first place.

As an aside, I am always hearing that one shouldn't 'keep count'. After a while of feeling like you're getting fucked, you do start to keep count and then when you're proven right that you're on the losing end of the stick, you get blasted for keeping count in the first place? Please. Perhaps if the other partner in the relationship actually contributed, then one wouldn't wake up one day thinking "geez, I wonder how out of whack the score is?" In the end, I really doubt I'll ever be convinced that it's OK to for one to do nothing while the other does everything. Don't keep count? You have to have at least a general idea of the score, don't you? I mean overall. I'm not talking about, "I did the dishes last night, so you do the dishes today." And I'm not even talking about chore-for-chore. I'm talking about the entire relationship as a whole. If you're happy to go to work and pay for everything all the time, then you must at least FEEL like you're getting something in return for your effort and sacrifice. For some, just the very fact that a girl spreads her legs for him is enough because he can't get laid by any other means. Well, my ass is worth just as much as hers, so I expect more. Maybe she gives you all the moral support you need and that's enough. Maybe just the look of admiration on her face every night is enough. That will all depend on the person as to what constitutes enough. But if you are implying that one should never, ever think about what they are getting out of a relationship in any aspect whatsoever, then tell me something, how do you evaluate your partner? How did you come to the decision that she is a caring, supportive, generous person? How did you come to think that she is "great" if you had no inkling of the score? If you don't keep any sort of score whatsoever, then you cannot evaluate her as a person and you certainly cannot compare her to anyone else now, can you?

No, I do not think that one should split hairs, and I never have, so don't imply it. But I'm not going to be giving and giving and giving and fucking giving some more when I get extremely little in return. No support, no compassion, no understanding, etc... In fact, instead of getting what should have been the most basic foundation of a relationship, I got repeatedly kicked in the head. So please, someone, make me understand what is so fucking bad about shaking your head one day and saying to yourself, fuck this shit, the balance is too out of whack for me to put up with this any longer. I'm not going to sit there all my life and get taken advantage of by some parasite that is only concerned with her own well being and has no concern for mine. If that makes me a bad person, then so be it. Vilify me all you want.

At its most basic, I need a woman who is caring, kind, supportive and loving. Under no circumstances will I settle in these qualities. If a woman insists on me working 50 hours a week so she can sit on her fattening ass doing virtually nothing, then I do not see that as very caring, kind, supportive or loving. If she had those qualities, she wouldn't want me to have to break me back to try so that she can live the life of Riley. She would try to do something to alleviate the stress in my life. She would see the imbalance herself and want to give more to the relationship. This is how I see it anyway.

She on the other had refused throughout the marraige to even get a part time job. She sat in the rented house (very nice house) that he slaved at work to pay for and chain smoked all day.

I can't speak for KV's buddy, but I would wager a bet to say that he wouldn't have traded places with her. Her life sounds boring as shit. She exists, that's it. Fuck, I love going to work. There are shit days, and there are hard days, but overall I really enjoy working. Let the wives of the world sit at home and have coffee with their friends. It's no skin off my back - I'm at work, surrounded by colleagues, having a great time while feeling productive.
RC

If you're OK with that, then it's your prerogative. I just don't understand it, that's all. You're taking care of her, but what are you getting out of this kind of relationship? How on earth could you be happy with that? How is her mere existence a plus to you? Sorry man, but I believe that two people should enhance each other's lives and they should WANT to.

[Oscar]

That's cheaper than hired help.

RC

I beg to differ.
Economically, it makes more sense to take the cab everywhere your whole life than to own your own car (provided that you live in urban Japan and not the continental USA). Likewise, as realestate is no longer a surefire investment, it makes sense to rent your home.
Take out the joy of owning a car or home and look solely at the monetary side and you find that ownership sucks.
Your wife is not going to cook you dinner all the time. She will not always competently clean the house. She will not always launder your clothes on time. She will not always keep you company or provide you with sex when you want it. If you look only at the money side of it, all things being equal, hiring part-time help which, let's face it, you wife pretty much equals, is cheaper.

If you hired a full-time live-in butler/housemaid, that would definately be more expensive than a wife. But most wives equal a professional housemaid/cook who comes in four times a week, if that.

If you hired a good cook/house maid three times a week, and hired an escort service at the same frequency for the sex, you would probablly get more sex and more housekeeping for the same or less price and definately less hassle than having a wife. You could probablly hire a part-time secretary to handle your mail and utilities into the mix and still come out ahead.

Why do we go fishing? It's a hell of a lot cheaper to just buy the fish. Especially when you are renting a boat to catch a sea snapper or the like. It makes no economic sense whatsoever. Don't even talk to me about sailing. Marriage, or even dating, makes about as much economic sense as fishing. And that's even before you take kids into consideration.

AND, as for getting your wife to go out and work, that's a bad idea.
When my wife was working, she was too damned tired to cook. She almost never came home early enough to do the cooking anyway. We ended out eating out 4-5 nights a week, which used up just about all the money she made. On top of which the groceries went rotten in the frige every week. The house was a mess and my wife was cranky with fatigue AND guilt ridden for not cooking more often, for which I had to spend a lot of my spare time holding her hand. It simply wasn't worth it. She was too busy to iron my shirts at home, yet had no time to retrieve the clothes from the dry cleaners and I was always short of shirts to wear. This is Japan. Full time work means 60 hours a week minimum for 40 hours worth of pay. Unless your wife is working the cash register at the supermarket for a 4-hour shift or working at a hostess bar, the chances are she will cost you more as a working wife than she would as a full time housewife.

[KinkiDude]

For the record, my personal view is that there IS value in having your wife stay at home in some cases. If you have kids, especially till they're 5 or so, and even in some cases till they're 10 or 12, there's an awful lot of work to do at home which, if she's working, you'll both have to take on, leaving you both too exhausted to enjoy your time together, ultimately damaging the relationship.

The only real issue I have with women staying home is if the extra income is necessary to live a decent lifestyle or if she wants to stay home, not because there's so much to do that it actually makes sense, but out of laziness because she knows she'll be done her duties in an hour and a half and have the rest of the day to laze around. In the case of the former, it means that you'll both have to work harder to live that decent lifestyle. She'll have to get a ft job and you'll have to take on some of the housework when you get home. That's just the way it is.

In the case of the latter, I just can't bring myself to accept a life of 12-hour days at work just so that my 'better' half can spend all her time finding ways to waste my money by filling up her time shopping and going out with friends. If it works for you, good on ya. It just doesn't work for me. However, like I mentioned before, it's not necessarily the money. If I make enough to live a decent life and she says she wants to go spend part of her days volunteering and helping the elderly or kids or whatever, I'd be cool with that. Hey, I might even be proud of her for that.

I guess to me, it's really all about ending up feeling used and taken for granted if I notice that kind of unbalance.

Honestly, for those of you that are fine with a wife who stays at home (no kids, smallish apartment), what is the thinking that makes it alright for you? Does she give you head every night you come home and make you feel like the king of her world or something? Fetch you your slippers and a newspaper and hang on your every word? I'm just trying to understand how, HOW, anyone can ever be ok with what is otherwise seemingly a very one-sided relationship!

[Oscar]

Well, the reason I have a wife is probablly akin to the reason I own a sailboat that I have time to sail about once a year.

It's as irrational as owning a Gucci handbag, a diamond ring or a Rolls Royce. It makes as much sense as drinking a Sant Emillion Gran Cru 1982. It's as irrational as getting a woven-to-order, hand-tailored, hand-painted kimono that you almost never wear.

The only reason that justifies it is that it rocks your boat. That is all.

[KinkiDude]

I understand what you're saying, Oscar, in terms of it being a very expensive proposition. But all of those things, they float your boat in certain ways. The things you mentioned are all horribly overpriced, but they do buy you something that only that item will buy: status, the self-satisfaction of achievement, the feeling of being special - even if it's only you that feels that way, etc.

That's all great, but I'm not asking why have a wife. I am not against marriage and I do not see it as completely without benefit. Like I said, with kids in the picture, I'd even be cool with a housewife. What I have trouble understanding is, what is the point of being in a marriage where one is doing almost all of the work while the other lives a life of quasi-luxury off his efforts.

[Oscar]

what is the point of being in a marriage where one is doing almost all of the work while the other lives a life of quasi-luxury off his efforts.

Same reason as you mentioned; "status, the self-satisfaction of achievement, the feeling of being special".

You buy a Ferrari, someone else will own the same model. Unless, of course it is one of those custom tailored Ferraris. You get a wife, she is yours. Nobody else has the same thing. You are her only husband. If you are not happy with that, well, a lot of people are not interested in custom tailored Ferraris either.

From a strictly economic point of view, a wife is a ridiculous luxury item. (Unless you are living in the middle ages and there is a desperate need to preserve your genes in the most controlled way possible. At one point, it must have made economic sense to have heirs to your fortune that had a high probability of carrying your genes.) And as such, it is not very different from all other economically stupid luxury items.

I am guilty of burning money on stupid luxuries all the time. Not just my wife. I am not inclined to care that my investment is stupid.

The bottom line is this. If you are not happy just LOOKING at your Ferrari, or just THINKING about your Ferrari, or just POLISHING your Ferrari with a daiper all day, you shouldn't be buying a Ferrari. The same applies to having a wife.

[tokyobloke]

The bottom line is this. If you are not happy just LOOKING at your Ferrari, or just THINKING about your Ferrari, or just POLISHING your Ferrari with a daiper all day, you shouldn't be buying a Ferrari. The same applies to having a wife.

WOW! Could not have put it any better myself. This is it exactly.

[Spanx]

Here here!

[KinkiDude]

I'm not sure if I just don't get it, or if I only confused the issue and can't explain myself... LOL
I'm going to try and think about how I can make my question clearer.

I tried to make clear, and failed, in my last post that I have hijacked my own thread from a purely economical point of view of being married to a question of how can a man be happy and satisfied with a woman that seemingly just takes and takes without giving anything back (or very little) - whether that be financial by getting a job and contributing, or dedicating more time and energy to him at home doesn't matter.

The expense of marriage IS high, and maybe it's worth it, maybe not. But that's not the question I'm asking. The question is, how can you be happy with a woman that gives almost nothing in return, whether that be financial, emotional, mental, spiritual, whatever. Not because she can't give you anything in return, but because she doesn't want to. Because she is selfish and would rather receive than give. That is my question.

The answers I am getting seem to imply that yes, you can be happy giving and giving and giving and getting extremely little in return from a woman. If your answer to this is, "yes, I don't mind devoting all of my effort in life to making my wife happy, even though she could barely give a shit enough about me to make any effort for my benifit" then so be it, I'll accept that. I'm not trying to get you to change your mind if that's the case. I just find it hard to believe that anyone can be alright with that, so I feel that it MUST be me that is not phrasing my question properly (or I've confused things by changing subjects.)


In the meantime, I'll continue with your Ferrari analogy...

The Ferrari is giving you exactly what you expected to get from it when you bought it for $300,000. It IS giving you the prestige, the looks and glances, the oohs and the aahs... it's giving you a wild rush as you speed along at 250km/h... it's giving you the handling that only that Ferrari can give you... it's giving you all sorts of things back for the money. If you have that kind of money to spend, then maybe it IS worth it. (The parallel here is that when I marry a woman, I fully expect her to be a loving, caring, supportive, respectful, generous person. You don't expect these things?)

Now say that Ferrari doesn't actually get you the oohs and aahs from your friends that you were hoping. Well, that doesn't mean it's not worth it. The Ferrari is still mostly living up to its part of the bargain.

But as I stated, we're talking about a wife that is NOT giving much, if anything, in return for all your efforts at making her happy. She really isn't all that concerned about your happiness, your state of mind, how tired you are at the end of the day, whether or not you're feeling down because work sucks recently, AND she stands there with hand out, waiting for you to hand over your paycheck. THIS IS OK WITH YOU?!!

Well, how happy would you be to find out that the new Ferrari has 200,000kms on the motor, ripped seats, rust all over the body, a blown piston, a missing muffler, needs a new suspension and has an Audiovox stereo? How happy would you be then to LOOK at it, THINK about it and POLISH it?

I'm not being facetious when I ask, is it me that didn't explain myself right, or are you guys just fucking with me?